2009-03-20 - 2:05 p.m.
Jack Is Selfish And Self Absorbed
Continued from the entry before...
It isn't me. It's you.
And it's in your head.
And everywhere around us.
It's everything.
Everywhere.
It is the world and it is getting to us both.
I am sorry I have been part of the problem.
But in a way, you have been too.
I wasn't there when you needed me.
But I needed to get away.
From everything. Yeah, even you.
You would never understand. Not too many people would.
There is no good way to say it. So I just don't.
You crave human contact. I do almost everything I can to avoid it. Sometimes that means avoiding you, but at the same time loving you.
How can I be a friend when I am never around anymore?
How can I love you while keeping a distance?
I don't know. But it's how I feel.
Sometimes I just don't want to be around.
But I never want you to leave.
I am not really gone. It just looks like it.
Sometimes I forget that it also feels like it.
Eventually I hurt everyone I really care about.
Maybe my therapist is right. If someone ever really loved me, I would not know what to do.
Continued...
Jack Contemplates Love And The Internet (3) - 2009-03-30
Jack Contemplates Love And The Internet (2) - 2009-03-30
Jack Contemplates Love And The Internet - 2009-03-30
Jack Is Selfish And Self Absorbed (2) - 2009-03-20
