2009-03-04 - 11:52 a.m.
Jack Is Eloquently Offensive
From the very beginning, I warned my therapist.
Before she heard it for herself and reacted in surprised offense. I gave her a fair warning. I have a terrible mouth.
Sooner or later, I knew it would come out.
Sooner or later, she would hear it.
That might be the only way for me to get things out. The only way for me to really get anywhere.
She has asked me before, why do I use that kind of language? I have a wonderful vocabulary. I am a very good writer. Why do I need to use words like that?
Personally, she thinks people hide behind violent language. Often because they are uneducated and do not know how else to express themselves. It is the exact opposite of eloquent.
I laughed a little and said that I like to think of myself as eloquently offensive. She has obviously never read Palahniuk.
If she did, she might see what I meant.
She thinks that I use bad language to keep people at a distance by offending them.
Yeah, I admit it. Sometimes.
But that is how I talk. Unpainted.
That was what I grew up around.
And I am not sorry for it.
Still I kind of wonder if it's socially acceptable to act out that way in therapy. Aren't you supposed to talk to your therapist as you would your family doctor?
Discuss your problems in a calm, non offensive voice.
Still, she tells me that I never have to apologize for anything I say in therapy. If she is offended, it is her problem, not mine.
She can be remarkably zen and removed sometimes.
Then there are times, I can tell she is losing her patience with me.
She never has. But I can tell when she has had enough of me.
She is only human.
She can only take so much.
Yesterday was almost a little too much.
Continued...
Jack's Restless Secret Thoughts - 2009-03-06
If There Was, Would Jack Ever Come Back? - 2009-03-06
Jack Is Not Even At The Beginning - 2009-03-06
Jack's Infuriated Immaturity - 2009-03-04
